You would probably not expect yourself to place well in a swimming race if you only got into the pool once every six months. And if you need to generate custom reports from the accounting software, you’ll probably seek training and experience so you can increase your comfort with the programming parameters.
\nWhen you engage in ANYTHING on a frequent basis, you become better and better at it, and it becomes easier.\u00a0 This statement applies whether we’re speaking about a physical skill (like running or ice skating), an intellectual skill (like learning a language or mastering a new software), or an emotional skill (like providing feedback, or sharing feelings in a situation).
\nYou know this is true. So why, if you want to become better at dealing with conflicts and other uncomfortable people situations, do you actively avoid the practice?
\n“Difficult conversations” come under the third category, emotional skills.\u00a0 Difficult conversations are usually only difficult because you don’t have them as often, so your skill sets are not as well developed.\u00a0 Yet if you engage with more frequency in conversations about small concerns (like an unclear email or a small mistake made or a single chore not performed), you will find that your comfort level and skill level both increase, and eventually the “difficult conversations” become easy.
\nStop telling me you’re uncomfortable. Do it. Try it. Practice it. work through your mistakes and “sore muscles.” Then come back and tell me about your performance.
\nYou won’t be good at what you don’t do. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"