{"id":1981,"date":"2011-10-26T06:34:14","date_gmt":"2011-10-26T10:34:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lifewithhappiness.com\/?p=1981"},"modified":"2018-10-02T13:36:48","modified_gmt":"2018-10-02T17:36:48","slug":"tips-for-an-unhappy-workforce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/2011\/10\/tips-for-an-unhappy-workforce\/","title":{"rendered":"TIPS FOR AN UNHAPPY WORKFORCE"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Most employees are already Unhappy, so it doesn\u2019t take much effort to nudge them into Insecurity, as well. <\/strong>Here\u2019s a quick reminder of how easy it is to keep your ungrateful subordinates in their place: under your control.<strong><span style=\"color: #ff0000\">**<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><strong>Keep Them Guessing.<\/strong> Tell them nothing that\u2019s not essential to their tiny little jobs.\u00a0 First, it\u2019s none of their business.\u00a0 Second, they\u2019re probably too stupid to understand important business concepts like you do.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Watch Them Like a Hawk.<\/strong> Show them why they can\u2019t be Trusted.\u00a0 Check their bags for smuggled company pens.\u00a0 When you spot phone numbers of friends or family on the call log, highlight those and send an invoice; as a convenience, offer to dock their pay rather than requiring a bank check.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Isolation is Your Best Offense.<\/strong> When you see coworkers talking, tell them that sharing ANY company information is a terminable offense.\u00a0 Don\u2019t communicate with other departments; if no one knows what you do, it will be easier to act hurt or outraged when your budget gets cut.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Leverage Fear to Keep Your Calendar Clear.<\/strong> To minimize useless meetings, loudly slam things around when you\u2019re in your office alone.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t have walls, put on your headset and pretend you are screaming on conference calls.\u00a0 Avoid eye contact with underlings \u2013 it creates false hope that you are approachable.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Remind Them Why You\u2019re the Boss.<\/strong> When you know the answer to a problem, say it quickly so you can demonstrate how smart you are.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t know the answer, sit back and let them solve it, then point out your excellent facilitation skills.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><strong>Remember, It\u2019s ALL about the Title: <\/strong>Who needs to learn leadership skills when fear, intimidation, and the exercise of raw power can get the job done with less effort?\u00a0 Tell your people to get happy on their own time, not yours.<br \/>\n<span style=\"color: #ff0000\"><strong>**<\/strong><\/span><span style=\"color: #0000ff\"><em><strong>P.S. Note from Jim: I did NOT have to make up any of this.<\/strong> Each of these bad behaviors came from stories shared by audience members.\u00a0 Hopefully none of them work for you!<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Happiness &#8211; the anti-leadership edition:  Most employees are already Unhappy, so it doesn\u2019t take much effort to nudge them into Insecurity, as well. Here\u2019s a quick reminder of how easy it is to keep your ungrateful subordinates in their place: under your control.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5789,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[58,11,50],"tags":[321,301,356],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>TIPS FOR AN UNHAPPY WORKFORCE - The Executive Happiness Coach\u00ae<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/2011\/10\/tips-for-an-unhappy-workforce\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"TIPS FOR AN UNHAPPY WORKFORCE - The Executive Happiness Coach\u00ae\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Happiness - the anti-leadership edition: Most employees are already Unhappy, so it doesn\u2019t take much effort to nudge them into Insecurity, as well. 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