{"id":3558,"date":"2018-09-17T15:07:41","date_gmt":"2018-09-17T19:07:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/happiness.mighty-little-websites.com\/?p=3558"},"modified":"2018-10-02T13:36:38","modified_gmt":"2018-10-02T17:36:38","slug":"how-habit-change-works","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/2018\/09\/how-habit-change-works\/","title":{"rendered":"How Habit Change Works"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In coaching my clients, I continually cycle through a <strong>simple, four-stage process:<\/strong>\u00a0<em>Awareness, Exploration, Design, and Practice x 3<\/em>.<\/p>\n<h2>1. Awareness<\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/files\/2018\/09\/TEHC_CoachingFlow-how-habit-change-works.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-3563 alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/files\/2018\/09\/TEHC_CoachingFlow-how-habit-change-works-167x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"167\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/files\/2018\/09\/TEHC_CoachingFlow-how-habit-change-works-167x300.jpg 167w, https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/files\/2018\/09\/TEHC_CoachingFlow-how-habit-change-works-100x180.jpg 100w, https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/files\/2018\/09\/TEHC_CoachingFlow-how-habit-change-works.jpg 171w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 167px) 100vw, 167px\" \/><\/a><strong>Awareness is the first and most important step toward adopting a new habit.<\/strong> If you engage in a habit that\u2019s not serving you, you must first realize you are doing it!<\/p>\n<p>Remember that habit is something that you\u2019ve done repeatedly and over time, such that it operates from your subconscious.\u00a0Every behavior you engage in was at one time working for you. Sometimes, what worked in the past is no longer effective \u2013 yet you\u2019re completely unaware you\u2019re doing it, and your system will <em>literally<\/em> filter out all data to the contrary. You become invisible to yourself.<\/p>\n<p>In the coaching conversation, I will hold a mirror up to you to help you \u201csee\u201d what you are doing,\u00a0and ask, \u201cis this working for you, the way you want it to?\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>Most people, once they become aware they have a non-productive habit\/behavior, become curious to learn, \u201cwhat\u2019s a better way for me to lead?\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0That moves us into stage two.<\/p>\n<h2>2. Exploration<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Here we ask many questions to understand and open up new possibilities<\/strong>, e.g.:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>What assessments do you hold about this situation?<\/li>\n<li>What \u201cstories\u201d do you tell yourself about your old behavior, and what do you want the new story to be?<\/li>\n<li>What emotional reactions do you have in \u2018X\u2019 situations, and what emotions would serve you (and others) better?<\/li>\n<li>What outcomes do you want instead?<\/li>\n<li>What are other options to achieve those outcomes?<\/li>\n<li>How do you want people to respond to you?<\/li>\n<li>What\u2019s stopping you?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>We will explore what is happening with you in three domains:<\/strong> <em>Your Head<\/em> (thinking, knowledge, judgments, self-talk, etc); <em>your Heart<\/em> (your emotional responses); and <em>your Body<\/em> (behavior, reaction, physical practices).<\/p>\n<h2>3. Design<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Next, we get very specific about what that new behavior will look like, again looking at all three domains of Language, Emotion, and Body.<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>What language will you use? How will you speak<\/li>\n<li>What must change in your self-talk?<\/li>\n<li>What internal shifts must you make to enable you to show up differently?<\/li>\n<li>What emotional space will you need to inhabit?<\/li>\n<li>In what ways will you embody this new behavior, language, posture, or reaction?<\/li>\n<li>What will you do?<\/li>\n<li>What resources will you access?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>The new habit you design might include elements of how you think, how or what you speak, even aspects of how you sit, stand, or move.\u00a0During the coaching conversation, I\u2019ll challenge you to embody the new behavior \u2013 literally \u201ctry it on\u201d \u2013 and tweak it till it works for you.<\/p>\n<p>And don\u2019t worry if you have no ideas \u2026 <strong>in the coaching conversation, we work together to co-create your new actions\/practices!<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2>4. Practice x3 \u2013 or x100!<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Whatever you design, you must then move into a regular practice<\/strong>. Remember, every habit you have became such because you practiced, practiced, practiced it until it was embedded in your cells \u2013 the way you fold your arms; the way you brush your teeth; the way you listen, react, give orders, make requests, walk, sit, stand, and breathe! To create a new habit, then, you must follow the same process of Practice, Practice, and more Practice!\u00a0Your success will only come thru repetition.<\/p>\n<p><strong>You see, every new thought or action lays down a new neural pathway in your brain<\/strong>. The more often you repeat a thought or behavior, the deeper that pathway is etched in your brain.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Metaphorically speaking, a habit is like a path in the forest that\u2019s been walked on so many times that the ground is bare and deeply rutted.<\/strong>\u00a0You can\u2019t make that path go away if you keep using it. But if you forge a new\/different path through the woods and take it often, the old path will slowly fill back in and grass will grow over it. You will still be able to take the path when you choose to, but it will no longer be your default \u2013 or only \u2013 route to your goal. <strong>This core cycle will repeat over and again throughout the course of your coaching engagement.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>NOTE:\u00a0The goal of coaching is not to create dependency \u2013 it is to support you in building a new infrastructure for your future!\u00a0<\/strong>Our goal, by the end, is for you to have developed the skill to observe yourself through this cycle so that you can carry the benefits of coaching with you long after your engagement is complete.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In coaching my clients, I continually cycle through a simple, four-stage process:\u00a0Awareness, Exploration, Design, and Practice x 3. 1. Awareness Awareness is the first and most important step toward adopting a new habit. If you engage in a habit that\u2019s not serving you, you must first realize you are doing it! Remember that habit is &#8230; <a title=\"How Habit Change Works\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/2018\/09\/how-habit-change-works\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about How Habit Change Works\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5789,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How Habit Change Works - The Executive Happiness Coach\u00ae<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/theexecutivehappinesscoach.com\/2018\/09\/how-habit-change-works\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How Habit Change Works - The Executive Happiness Coach\u00ae\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In coaching my clients, I continually cycle through a simple, four-stage process:\u00a0Awareness, Exploration, Design, and Practice x 3. 1. 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