DO I BELONG HERE? REFLECTIONS ON MY WHITENESS

DISCLAIMER: This post moves into territory I have never before addressed publicly. I recognize that for some this topic may push into what they experience as polarizing space. I offer this essay as MY reflection on MY experience in the world right now, and I make no judgment whatsoever about you and your position in the … Read more

I Don't Want to be a Superstar; I just want to be ME!

I wish inspirational commercials like this were actually run on television, where they could reach more people and offer positive messages in the media. It’s a minute and a half, and the most powerful message comes right at the end: I don’t want to be a superstar; I want to be better than that. I … Read more

Second, Be the Real You

Gifts for the New Year: Be the Real You Notice all the places in your life where you feel distracted and stressed by how you’re behaving. Happiness Principle #13, Be Authentic, reminds that when you stop trying to “play a role” to fit what you think other people expect of you, you give yourself the … Read more

First, Believe in Happiness

Gifts for the New Year:  First, Believe in Happiness At my coaching group’s annual holiday gathering, we exchange used, gift-wrapped books. When a book is opened, the person who brought it stands up to tell the story of how that book impacted impacted them, and why they chose to share it.  One woman’s personal story … Read more

What's Love Got To Do With It?

One of my clients has been blogging her way through the coaching experience.  After years of holding all her thoughts inside, she’s discovered that writing helps her reveal herself to herself.  Recently, we revisted an old topic — ♥ self love.♥ This client (who goes by the anonymous title of Spudsie, a childhood nickname) is … Read more

Are You as Happy as You Want to be?

Are you are as happy as you want to be?  Have you “succeeded” yet still find happiness elusive?  Do you sometimes feel “stuck” in your career or your life, without a clear path to what’s next for you? If those questions caused you to pause for a moment, I invite you to read on. What … Read more

Life is good. Huh?

So, the buckle on my good leather briefcase broke, and while it’s getting fixed I’ve been using another smaller case I purchased from a Life Is Good store in the Chicago Midway airport. It’s actually an over-the-shoulder messenger bag, so when I’m walking around with it the bag hangs behind me. I’ve been having lots … Read more

How Dare You Put Yourself First?!

It’s the end of a coaching conversation, and my client confesses, “I notice this whole conversation has been about me. Usually I’m working on everybody else and what they need. I like it… but I’m really uncomfortable.” She’s in her mid-40’s and in all that time it’s never been about her. What she hears in … Read more

Who am I to be happy?

Truly, have you ever asked yourself that question?
This modest blog will seek to provide answers to that question, several times each week. I’m a Professional Certified Coach with a grounding in positive psychology, emotional competency, and working with the body. I believe that what happens for us in our life comes from a combination of what we think, how we manage our emotions, and how we hold ourselves in the world.
Have you ever heard the concept: “my thoughts create my feelings, and my feelings create me behavior, and my behavior determines by outcomes?” Well, I hold it to be true. Something happens, and I interpret that event (maybe tell myself a story about it). The event is just neutral… but my story puts all sorts of meaning to what happened (ooh, he was out to embarrass me. She did that on purpose. I knew it, they’re all out to get me. I doesn’t matter what I do, I’m always screwing up.)
My “story” gets me all emotional, and from that emotional space, i take action. Not always the best action, but hey, emotions aren’t rational!
What I do is teach people practices that can help them INTENTIONALLY shift their response to stories and emotions, so that they get the results they WANT instead of the results that don’t work for them.
Stay tuned. This is just my introduction!
In happiness, Jim Smith, The Executive Happiness Coach®